What are Your Values?

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What are Your Values?

In every situation, parents have several ways to respond. Each response conveys different values to the children involved. Read each situation, check the response closest to yours, and then look up your values. This quiz is adapted from Using Your Values to Raise Your Child to Be an Adult You Admire by Harriet Heath, Ph.D. (Parenting Press, 2000)

1. Three year old Jake proudly dressed himself in a dotted pink shirt with green and red plaid pants. You---
a. Comment, "You dressed yourself today" b. Tell Jake to change clothes c. Notice but say nothing about his clothes, d. Decide to talk about clothes combination

2. Your daughter Samantha's pet dog Fudge died. She is crying and wants to have a funeral for the dog. You --
a. Tell Samantha not to cry b. Rush out and buy a new pet c. Cuddle Samantha and support her preparation for a funeral d. Talk about life and death, and how she can remember Fudge

3. It's 7:00PM and Jay (age 9) and Jenny (age 6) have not picked up the Legos as they promised. You --
a, Say, "Come now and I'll help you pick up the Legos. If we work quickly we will have time for a board game before bed." b. Pick up the toys and put them away for several days c, ignore the toys d. Pick up the toys and put them where they are kept.


4. "Ted-dy is a ba-by," chants Allison to her three year old younger brother. Ted starts to cry, protesting that he is not a baby. You--
a. Send Allison to her room b, Ignore them c. Ask Allison how ted is feeling d. Teach Ted to decide for himself if Allison's claim is true and how to respond.
5. Your ten-year old son wanted music lessons and agreed to complete the year. After three months he wants to stop music lessons.You ---
a. Let him stop b. Tell him he must finish the year as planned c. Ask him why he wants to stop and discuss the implications of doing so d. Help him develop a strategy to finish the year
6. Your sixteen-year old son is invited to a party where you both know alcohol is apt to be served. You ---
a. recognize the possibilities and allow your child to go with no comment b. Allow the teen to go but tell him you will wait up for him and expect no smell of alcohol on his breath c. Discuss what might occur and help your teen make a plan d. Do not allow your teen to go.
7. Your daughter Jenny has promised to go to a friend's birthday party but now, the day of the party, she does not want to go. You --
a. Accept her decision not to go b. Talk to her about how the other child will feel if she does not go c. Insist that she go to the party

8. When your children leave for school, You --
a. Make sure to hug each one b. Check that their homework is in their book bags c. Remind them not to keep the carpool waiting

9. Your five-year old has had his story and been tucked in upstairs. Five minutes later, you hear "I want a drink." You--
a. Tell him to be quiet and go to sleep b. Take him a drink c. Call from downstairs, telling him to go get a drink and then get back into bed.

10. Your attitude towards your children's homework is a set policy. You--
a. Feel it is the child's work. You do not get involved. b. Review assignmens and check to see the homework is done well. c. Set a time and place for doing homework.

As a reminder, this information should not be relied on as medical advice and is not intended to replace the advice of your child’s pediatrician. Please read our full disclaimer.

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