In many respects, we do the same thing to our children when we spank them.

Spanking has always be en a popular method of disciplining children., rooted deep in the tradition that if you spare the rod you spoil the child. Over 80 percent of American parents believe that spanking their children is an effective form of punishment. This majority also believes that spanking real1y is not that painful and what was done to them as children must also somehow be good for their own children.

Spanking as a form of punishment is based on the theory that a child will avoid pain; therefore, if misbehavior will lead to pain, the child will not commit the act. This logic, unfortunately, fails in several regards. First, there are many children who seem to prefer any form of parental attention, even pain, to being ignored and will seek physical punishment as a means of gaining that attention.

Second, with repeated episodes, some children quickly become immune to the true meaning behind being spanked and begin to associate pain with hate. It is rare that any intentionally inflicted pain will have a positive influence on a child.

Furthermore, while the child is being spanked, the are not thinking about what they did wrong or how they will change in the future. A child on the receiving end of a spanking is hurt, scared, and frightened.

Many people counter with, I was spanked when I was a child, and I turned out all right. While it is true that some adults seem to have survived the emotional and physical trauma of being hit by loved ones, many carry with them into adulthood the memories of frequent beatings and the feelings of hate, sullenness and rage. Most will not remember they were spanked, but will recall their humilation and anger being spanked.

In most cases, spanking usually is used as a lastresort after other methods, such as threats and reasoning, have failed to change a child s behavior. Usually it is not planned but occurs in a burst of anger when parents have reached their limits of frustration and many times are out of control.

For the moment, spanking seems to work: It relieves the tension in the parent and makes the child obey. But this solution is only temporary.

If spanking is so effective, why do child psychologists, pediatricians and many parents have such an uneasy feeling about it? Many of us are concerned about the term effects of physical punishment.

In fact, we are a little embarrassed by the use of spanking and feel there ought to be a better way of solving the problem. Other cultures have recognized this, and in many parts of the world spanking a child is considered a crime.

From the onset, spanking as a means of behavior control seems doomed to failure. The emotional wounds that it inflicts far outlive the physical wounds. It humiliates the dignity of the child, alienates the parents and, in fact, may encourage retaliation.

If a child conceives that the experience of physical pain for a misbehavior, then the child may feel that they have a new license to misbehave again. Subsequent development of a behavioral conscience and the ability to choose right over wrong acts is delayed as children fail to feel guilty for what they have done. They just hurt.

Equally wrong with spanking is the lesson it teaches children. The word discipline comes from the Greek meaning teacher. Teaching is the goal of discipline but disciplinary spanking is a contradiction in terms. Spanking demonstrates to impressionable minds that there are violent methods of dealing with frustra tion. The message it sends is when you are angry hit. Spanking teaches that we resolve conflict through physical means and that it is all right for us to be out of control when we need to control another s behavior. Do we want to tell our children that it is okay for the strong to hurt the weak if the strong get mad enough or the weak are deserving enough? In addition, spanking teaches children that it is sometimes okay to purposely hurt those people that you love. Certainly spanking cannot be considered the best method for changing behavior.