Talking with kids about disasters

Talking to your children about disasters

by Gregory Keer

Since 9/11, psychologists and other mental-health experts have expounded on the ways to talk to children about disaster. now, the world is faced with yet another story that has dominated the news for days: The tsunami in southeast Asia. With the mass of information available, here are a few suggestions that may help ease their kids' minds.

1. Assure them of their safety
No parent can guarantee that they can keep their children safe from harm -- but the children don't need to know that. What they do need to know is that you will do everything in your power to keep them safe. Especially for young kid, this blanket statement will calm them, giving them a tangible answer to their chief question of whether anything will hurt them.

2. Stay calm and be comforting
Always remain calm as you explain things to them, so they do not sense any fear you might have. Couple your words with plenty of hugs and comforting touch so they sense the security blanket you really are.

3. Encourage questions
By all means, invite them to ask any questions they may have so they can work out their thoughts with you. If you can't

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answer something, go and find an answer from an information resource, a friend, or doctor, if need be. You are your child's protector and source of information, which is usually a lot better than the mass media, which often sensationalizes things. If you do let them watch a news report, do it in small doses and do it together so you can answer those inevitable questions.

4. Explain how nature works
Nature is as beautiful as it is terrible. You don't want your child to worry that the natural world is out to get them. So, while you can explain how earthquakes and tsunamis work, also tell them how most human beings survive and build themselves back up. In addition, discuss with them how nature creates land and life in dramatic fashion and sustains us in the quietest ways.

5. Help them help others
Children may feel powerless, not only in the face of nature, but because they are so far away from those affected. Choose a charity, be it the Red Cross or Doctors Without Borders or some other organization, and have them give some of their allowance to send to those in need in the affected areas of Asia and Africa. You might even use this opportunity to teach them about the countries and cultures impacted.

By helping your children through their own fears of disaster, you will meet one of the great tests of parenthood. Bear in mind that if all you do is tell them that you will protect them with everything in your power, you will be doing very well by your children.

About the author: Gregory Keer is a syndicated columnist, teacher and on-air expert on fatherhood. His Family Man ™ column appears in publications across the country. For more information, see his online fatherhood magazine, FamilyManOnline.com.. Posted 01-08-04 on kidsgrowth.com

As a reminder, this information should not be relied on as medical advice and is not intended to replace the advice of your child’s pediatrician. Please read our full disclaimer.